I hope He calls again...

It just hit me last night. I was in our cell group, which I started attending just a few weeks ago, listening to the group leader when he said something about "the will of God". That woke me up to my wits and became more attentive to what he has to say about this. It was stupid of me to think that he would tell me His will for me. Hah! I was actually wishing he would just tell me straight because frankly, I don't have a clue. I admire those people who at least has a vague idea of their purpose in life. I often wonder how these few people knew their purposes, while I, stood in the dark. Then last night it hit me. I don't know my purpose because I don't know how to listen and I don't know how to talk to Him. Maybe he's been trying to call my attention all these years and have been wanting to reveal His will for me but then unconsciously, I might have been deaf to His call. And so from now on, I will try to listen and try to talk to Him more. Then maybe soon when I know Him better and when I can finally say that I have a relationship with God, then maybe He'd call on me again and by that time, I may not be as deaf as I was.

I am getting way too holy here, so I must stop now before heaven takes me while I'm still in my pajamas...